In the corner of my mind someplace a place close to my heart… I don’t mind gentleness… Kindness… Softness…
But bells ring like a fire alarm anytime a guy shows a little bit of interest in me. (I’m flattered, thanks but…)
I simply can’t see myself with someone.
I still love LOVE. Especially filmy, rom-com, books, and poetry… The Walt Disney “happily ever after” fairytale… I love writing about love too… But I know in real life it isn’t like that.
I don’t crave it like I used to. I think being able to love myself has helped me with that.
Now should it be a friend or a stranger in love, I am happy for them! I love seeing two souls that have grown in love together it’s beautiful.
But for me? Nah I’m good! I know it’s trauma. I know my triggers… I am working on myself. And I need all the time I need until I can trust the opposite sex. (With – in reason of course)