The Luggage

First I had my bags packed for the first few years in this country that I now call home…

Then some of my luggage started to reek of death.  rotten…

I had to open one bag at a time, un pack, wash one sock at the time… some dresses didn’t fit so I had to throw them… while others were too dear and hold precious memories… I had to find a way to clean and save them… with their discolored flowers I couldn’t throw away my flowered pink dresses… so I went away for some years to find the right dry cleaner… I had also my precious pearls that fit perfect with my dress… but the neckless was torn… so I had to go back to dark places, terrible spaces… I had to go back there!! To find my precious pearl… in the alley were my neckless was torn apart… I run away then, but now I had to go back… with nothing but trembling self.

I walked slowly, not to miss my pearl… there were times I stepped on my pearl and went through the alley just to return with nothing…

I had to sleep and rest some days, just to go back again and take another look…

While I was asleep, I would dream of my matching pearl neckless, earrings, bracelet and even a anklet.

I would dream I would never find them again…

So, I would go back again crawl in the alley, with a brighter torch this time… some days I would find a pearl or two… sometimes I would find another pearl but it would be smaller or bigger than my own… I would pluck them out of the dirt with my hands and nails. brush them wash them with my tears and put them up so that when their owner come back, they would find their precious pearls…

So, when you ask me where I have been all this time…

I have been fixing my dresses and my pearls…

Sometimes I would find someone else looking for a pearl in the alley… how could I know that they would snatch mine from me? They would use my pearls show them off, wear it and once they had lost their magic, their spark, they would throw them in a trash bin… I would linger in the shadows, go back and take them out of the trash bin. Wash them and clean them with my tears…

Now my dear I am back… with all my pearls… and flower dress.

It has taken me years… we are whole again.

Some pearls are broken some dresses thorn… but when I wear them, they match. We match. We fit we are meant to be.

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